Here’s another installment in my continuing my series on the 7 Habits of Highly Effective Communicators.
HABIT 5: SEEK FIRST TO UNDERSTAND, THEN TO BE UNDERSTOOD
This habit is a biggie for those of us communicating to the masses — to the ofttimes nameless and faceless people we call our audience. It’s especially easy for us to do what Covey says most people do and that’s “listen with the intent to reply, not to understand.” But even though we usually cannot physically hear our audience, effective communicators must find ways to truly understand the meaning of what their audience would say if they could say it.
How to incorporate it:
First, make a conscious effort to set aside preconceived notions. Whether you’re speaking in front of a group, making a pitch to a new client or writing copy for your web site, do not assume you know everything your audience is thinking, feeling or doing. Of course you’ll want to anticipate the types of things they’d want to know, but don’t be so arrogant as to say things like “I know you’re thinking that …” You don’t know. Not for sure, anyway. So don’t say it.
Second, find a way to tap into your audience’s dialogue. Are they blogging, tweeting or putting up videos on YouTube? Can you read the emails they send customer service or listen in on phone calls with the sales team? What about reading comment cards, studying surveys and observing focus groups? Any means by which you can simply observe your audience will help you understand them.
Lastly, remember that this habit is about listening. (Really listening, not fake listening until you can say what you want to say.) Look at things from the audience’s vantage point and step back and wait. Digest the information you’re given. Don’t make judgments, ask questions, give advice or interpret the other person’s motives. Just take what you learn at face value before opening up the dialogue.
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